Jon of All Trades

Browsing the "Rants" Category


Seeing as increasing empathy in the world is basically the entire foundational reason I started my show and continue with it three years later, you can imagine my surprise and disappointment upon scrolling through LinkedIn (which, I know, what?), and [...]

March 29, 2017 Blog, Rants

Trolling the Troll

The two-week layoff between the conference championship games and the Super Bowl is a cosmic wasteland of NFL news, which leaves the drones and shills who cover the NFL precious little to discuss. As a general practice, I avoid most [...]

February 5, 2016 Blog, Rants, Sports


A couple of years ago, my friend Jason and I got good and drunk and saw the movie Escape Plan. If you don’t remember it – and why would you? – the movie features Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger trying [...]

January 22, 2015 Blog, Rants, Sports

Eaten Alive

I’ve been reading about last night’s Discovery Channel freakshow “Eaten Alive” (my favorite take is here, by the amazing and hilarious Sean O’Neal) where some asshole masquerading as a conservationist tries to get eaten alive by an anaconda. The mere [...]

December 8, 2014 Blog, Film and Television, Rants


As I was doing my usual slack assing at work this morning, I read the AV Club’s weekly football column, and while writing about the Raiders, columnist John Teti offered these thoughts: “There’s a good chance that Oakland will go [...]

November 14, 2014 Blog, Rants, Sports


Today I watched a video of a man in an elevator punch his wife in the face, which knocked her out and caused her head to bounce off the railing inside that elevator car. I will not link to this [...]

September 9, 2014 Blog, Rants

True Blood

Last Sunday True Blood wrapped up its seven season run, after which I Tweeted and Facebooked: “Thank god that’s over. #TrueBlood” I meant it, too, because this seventh season has been a boring slog that Kristin and I have watched [...]

August 26, 2014 Blog, Film and Television, Rants


It’s the 4th of July. My parents and my best friend are coming over today. We’re going to grill, we’re going to drink beer, and then we’re going to watch the parade through the neighborhood. Then, my wife, my best [...]

July 4, 2014 Blog, Rants


Yesterday the Rockies played the Braves and beat them 10-3. This is great on its own because Go Rockies and fuck the Braves. In the bottom of the 8th, Corey Dickerson fouled off a pitch and accidentally struck catcher Gerald [...]

June 13, 2014 Blog, Rants, Sports


Truly, motivation is weird. Thanks to probably some dumb fucking Facebook ad, I saw the Insane Inflatable 5k coming to Denver. I ran the Warrior Dash (very slowly) a couple of years ago, which sort of dissuaded me from wanting [...]

April 25, 2014 Blog, Inside My Head, Rants